Seeing the best in life's challenges

The Ultimate Relationship: Part II

on August 2, 2013

Part I said:  “The Ultimate Relationship is possible when two individuals both attain high skill levels of relating with Unconditional Love and Acceptance. “

But there’s another side to the story of relationships, and I find it really interesting to think about.  It’s really hard to define, but we all know what I’m talking about.

We have all met people that we instantly “click” with, and we’ve all met people that seem perfectly nice, but we just don’t “click.”  So what’s with the clicking??  How does that work?  Can we get more specific about what is going on when this happens?

I like the concept that we all have an “energy signature” that is uniquely ours and ours alone.  We each have this complicated mix of personality, experience, strengths and fears…..and underneath it all, even if you strip all that away like the layers of an onion, deep inside we are still unique at the soul level.  You could say we each have a unique soul essence.  So think of each person as being this one-of-a-kind ball of energy.

I came across a description, a couple of years ago, of how souls were created by God, and it goes like this:

With a breath, God created a spark outside of itself, the idea of a piece of God, separate from God.  Like the process of cell division, the spark divided into two, then divided again, and again, over and over.  With each separation, these pieces of God differentiated.  Like the branches of a tree, they split and split, and as they approached the end of the process, soul groups and soul families were the result.  These pieces, destined to be individual souls, had traveled this process together and remained close.  The final division was the painful split of male and female.  These final pairs, split in two, are what people refer to as Twin Souls.

There are all kinds of descriptions of this process that you can find.  Some even tell you how many individuals are at each level or split, getting very precise with numbers.  I have read that it’s really much more complicated (which I tend to believe!).  Still, to me this is a useful concept to use when talking about compatible energy signatures or soul essences.

The idea is, when you meet a member of your Soul Group or Soul Family, your energy is very similar and you just feel comfortable right away, like they are…!!

Some say that we are at the still point between the outbreath of God and the inbreath of God – where we stop moving apart, and start being gathered back to God.  We get the idea that the splitting/creating part took a very long time……and so one would assume that the gathering back to Oneness with God will similarly take a long time.

However long it takes, this process of creation and gathering back into Oneness was set in motion by the power of Creation, and there’s no stopping it.  We will ALL return to God.  No one gets left behind.

(I’m not going to get into scripture and what it says about being gathered back to God.  I’m pondering here, not trying to “prove” anything.  But I will say one thing.  If God gathers the lost and scattered from the four corners of the earth, who will he gather?  In Isaiah 11 he is talking about the Jews.  Well, my sister recently had her DNA tested.  We are as WASPy as they come……and she has Ashkenazi Jewish DNA.  Despite our modern-day labels of who is this and who is that, we are ALL related.  We are all one family.  MAN focuses on our differences.  GOD loves all his children.)

There’s also another overlay that we can take into account.  Throughout time, if we have had many past lives, we have been working with many souls, life after life, and so of course these souls feel very familiar also.  They may be part of our soul family, but more likely they are not.  The thinking is, that soul families went off in their different directions, to experience more diversity and learn more that they could eventually bring back to the family.  If you read Many Lives, Many Masters, the author’s patient could identify the different roles that were played by the souls she knew, life after life.  I just read the novel Life After Life by Kate Atkinson, and she uses this concept in her book as well.  Check out this review by a friend of mine.

Throughout the process of life after life, relationship after relationship, we have each had all kinds of experiences.  Eventually, if the premise is true, that the purpose of EVERY relationship is for us to practice relating to others with unconditional acceptance and love, then we will each gain the ability to love another unconditionally.  That will make it possible for us to experience the Ultimate Relationship.

Now, remember the Fundamental Truth??

Before you can love another, you must love yourself.  Or, another way to say it is, you can only love another to the level of your ability to love yourself.

So that means, first you must have the Ultimate Relationship with YOURSELF.

You must know that you are lovable and loved.  You must let go of all judgment of yourself.  You must accept yourself as you are.  You must be complete in just yourself.  You will not “need” another.

Soul Mates will help you get there.  (check out the post on Types of Soul Connections.)  You are working with other souls on this, practicing, peeling away your insecurities and fears, facing rejection, learning from mistakes, all of it.  All of the relationship drama, the ups and downs, the different personalities, are helping you to obtain all the skills needed for that Ultimate Relationship.

Until you attain it WITH YOURSELF, you will only go so far.

Back to the idea of the compatible energy signatures.  If you were following the concept of the splitting off process, you would naturally come to the conclusion that the person with the closest energy to yours would be……drum roll…..your Twin Soul.  Not only would this person have the identical energy signature, it would be the perfect complement to yours.  This sounds really exciting, right? .  If When you meet this person, the “clicking” would be dramatic, you would KNOW, right?  Yes, this person is the ONE with whom you can have the ULTIMATE Ultimate Relationship with!!!

But not so fast….

Remember the two requirements:

You have to learn to love yourself unconditionally.


Any relationship can only be as healthy, and can only rise to the level of,

the individual with the lesser Ability to Love.

Which means both parties to the relationship must have done a lot of practicing and learning in relationships. 

A lot. 

So I just told you the secret. 

And now you know, the only thing you can do is work on you.  Love yourself.  Practice loving others just where they are.

And trust that, when the time is right, it will all click.


Also, I have NO idea why the fonts went all crazy like that.  But I’m not going to mess with it!

6 responses to “The Ultimate Relationship: Part II

  1. starlight says:

    Reblogged this on kundalini-rising experiences and commented:
    reblogged because I agree with it.

  2. starlight says:

    Yeah, I’ve been thinking about this too! What I’ve read from ‘some sources’ is that you should love others more than yourself! But I worry about this ‘martyr’ situation (which is CLEARLY an imbalance!) it just doesn’t sit right with me. If we’re all equal, why should any one person totally sacrifice themselves in order to help others? that by nature is a clear ‘division’, when really there is none! I mean if there is a huge detriment to the martyr person who feels terrible and doesn’t help them-self but tries to help others.

    Also, if someone is too selfish, that clearly doesn’t work either, it’s like they are literally focusing inwards to take whatever they want. If we all did this, the result would be pure chaos!

    Okay, so what I really think is, you need to emit love from your heart, outwards! While it is flowing outwards, you feel it (so that makes you just feel love in general, for yourself, for stuff in general). This type of emitting love seems to naturally and effortlessly flow out onto others!

    Meanwhile, if someone has a lot of blockages (emotional problems/other problems), even if they WANT to love others – when they emit their aura out (which happens automatically), they just sort of spill out all these uncomfortable problems and anxieties onto others which make people generally feel bad.

    So its like that situation where you meet someone who you can tell is trying hard to be a good and truthful person – but they’re just SO uncomfortable to be around because of awkward/anxious/stressed/negative emotions constantly spilling out that you want to get the heck out of their way.

    I also understand what you mean about ‘just clicking’ with certain people, while many other people seem like nice people but you just don’t ‘click’ or feel any resonance with them.

    So really the only solution is to be an ’emitter’, of a lot of love energy which seems to radiate out of the heart. This energy comes out of a central point and goes into the person so they feel love in general, this love spills out into their aura making them automatically accept them-self! And when they accept them-self, it’s very easy to start accepting others.

    Many of the most judgemental people are very judgemental about themselves, so they feel highly critical about everything they are and do. It’s hard to be accepting of others when you’re so judgemental about yourself!

    And like it said, the martyr situation initially might look admirable but really that person is just creating a division between them and everyone else, thinking that everyone else deserves or needs love but they don’t. But really we’re all part of the same stuff! So we all must need the same stuff 🙂

    Phew. Does that make sense?

    • jlcmom says:

      It ALL makes sense to me! I recently read The Celestine Prophecy, and he talks about people needing energy and getting energy and the “control dramas” people use to get energy (attention/LOVE) from others. I have been thinking a lot about this, and plan to write about it because there’s so much more about how we get energy/love.

      I agree with you, you HAVE to love yourself and respect yourself enough not to get taken advantage of. It’s all a balance.

      The Celestine Prophecy talks about learning how to get love from Source/God, which is an unlimited supply, and so if you can do that, then you can radiate it out and never get a deficit.

      Thanks so much for commenting – I love it!!


  3. […] The Ultimate Relationship:  Part I  and  Part II […]

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